It’s Five Minute Friday time, friends. Today’s word is: Release.
I held on so tightly, fists clenched and knuckles white. Holding on to the pain and confusion, refusing to lay it down though I couldn’t carry it anymore. My fingernails pressed into the palms of my hands, leaving half-moon shapes deep in the skin.
Until that moment of surrender, when out of desperation I finally gave it up.
My clenched fists released, and the burden slipped like smoke through my fingers. In that moment of release, forgiveness began. <-Click to Tweet
The path turned from desperation to healing, and I took my first tentative steps on the road towards hope and rebuilding faith that lay in shambles.
I left the church of my childhood during college, and I left bearing spiritual scars that seared deep from my years there. Instead of turning to Him, I felt ashamed. As if I was doing something wrong, or leading myself down the wrong road. In my confusion, I drew away from Him and allowed the hurt to grow.
But in truth, the community at that church was no longer healthy, and I shouldn’t have stayed there. It was no longer a place I could call a church home, and I left confused and hurt. I held onto that pain, pushing it aside and pretending it didn’t exist.
But when I finally released all the feelings of hurt, anger, and confusion, healing began. When I finally committed to forgiveness, I felt my heart begin to soften.
I began to see something new in my relationship with God. Something beautiful.
Today I’m linking up with Lisa-Jo and the #FMFParty community. If you like to write, come join us. It’s a blog party where we write for five minutes only, pouring out our souls and holding back the inner editor.
Come join. I promise it’ll be fun!