africa

Five Minute Friday: Choose

Today is Friday, so of course it’s time for Five Minute Friday. Where I gather with hundreds of other bloggers to write for five minutes only, together, on a common theme. Want to join in on the action? Check out Lisa-Jo Baker’s blog!

Today’s word is: Choose.

Go.

Life is full of choices. What to eat, what to wear, when to pick up the phone and give a friend a call, how to spend a Thursday night (#FMFparty anyone?). Of course we have to deal with the consequences or outcomes: happiness, sadness, joy, frustration, and the unexpected outcomes that so easily surprise us. That’s just part of living life-the choices we make.

But what about the choices we don’t make? What about the times when we are forced to do something? How do we accept it?

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A few months ago I was enjoying living my life in Africa. I lived in a rural community with a host family, and I had a whole host of projects to keep me busy until my departure in September 2014: Teaching preschoolers to read, starting gardens at local primary schools, helping HIV+ mothers start an income generating project, teaching youths life skills and how to be successful adults. It was hard work, but I loved it.

Then a misstep. An injury. And a surgery.

Suddenly my life in Africa fell apart. I had two hours to say goodbye to my community and pack up my life. Two suitcases hastily packed, filled with the sundries of my African life. Then I was on a plane a few days later. Headed “home”.

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It wasn’t my choice, and it’s been difficult to accept. To deal with.

I feel guilty. I feel homesick. I feel lost. I feel as if I let my entire community down.

Choices are a part of life, but so are the choices we don’t make, the ones which happen to us when we aren’t expecting it, and which alter our lives.

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I’m still working through all of these issues, and I don’t know if I’ll ever feel totally at peace with how I left my life in Africa. But the Lord is right beside me, helping me through it all. And someday, I hope to visit the country I’ve fallen in love with again. To see those people I didn’t get to say goodbye to properly.

-Jen

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6 thoughts on “Five Minute Friday: Choose

    1. Thank you, friend! The prayers are always needed! I feel like I’m finally on even ground again, getting my footing after having the rugged pulled out from under me. But some days, it’s still overwhelming!

  1. I’m so sorry for the suddenness of all of this! Praying you are healing – physically and in every way. I am believing with you that you will once again visit Africa. Trusting with you that He was not surprised and will use all things together for your good! (and I am just guessing but I am quite confident that your community is missing you, but not for a second feeling let down by you!)

    1. Thank you Karrilee, for the prayers and kind words! I pray I can return to Africa again soon, and see the dear friends I had to leave behind. I’m just not sure what He has planned in that regard, but I’m trusting in Him!

  2. I’m sorry for what you’ve had to go through! I’m thankful that God’s ways are higher than ours and His plans perfect! Thanks for sharing your struggles. I hope you get to go back!

    1. Hi Mandy, thanks for coming by! Yes, His ways are always higher, and I’know they are only for my good. Sometimes it’s easy to forget that though… 😉

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